booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
