Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
