i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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