I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
