His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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