Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sobbing to NWA
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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