I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
