Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
