there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
