Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
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ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
just found out that she named her cat after me.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
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