i can't believe i had my finger in that
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize