when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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