thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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