is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
