i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
She needs sedatives and a leash
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
