Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
