break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Found your dick twin last night
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
