He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
