god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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