i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize