I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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