it hurts more in the daytime
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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