Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I cockslap morals
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
