Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
