Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
