I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
