"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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