I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize