Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
