David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
