I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
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