He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
