just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
ttyl tear gas
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
