remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
