they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
She has the best kind of daddy issues