she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
