Swine flu. Run for my life!
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I wish there were birth control emojis
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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