I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
