im drinking this country out of the recession.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
