I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
