i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
