# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
