PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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