When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
