operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
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