it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
