no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Gay?
German.
Pity.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
