I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
