I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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