u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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