she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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